“I Want to Be There to See It”: How Netflix’s Love at First Sight Perfectly Captures the Beauty of Living Memorials

“I do hate it when people say nice things about me behind my back. I think it’s a tragic waste.”

When Netflix’s “Love at First Sight” gave us Tessa Jones’ living memorial, it did more than just create a moving scene in a romantic film – it opened up a beautiful conversation about how we can choose to say goodbye differently. Through a Shakespeare-themed celebration filled with music, laughter, and heartfelt moments, the film showed us how these unique ceremonies can transform what is traditionally a somber occasion into something truly magical.

In this article, we’ll explore how Tessa’s living memorial masterfully demonstrates how end-of-life celebrations can be transformed from somber occasions into joyful, theatrical celebrations that honour both the person’s passions and their relationships. The film shows how a living memorial can be a beautiful blend of laughter and tears, memories and hopes, farewells and celebrations – all while the guest of honour is present to share in the love and appreciation.

It demonstrates that saying goodbye doesn’t have to follow traditional formats, but can instead be as unique and vibrant as the person being celebrated.

Tessa’s Living Memorial Love at First Sight Film

In a touching scene from Netflix’s “Love at First Sight,” Tessa Jones (brilliantly portrayed by Sally Phillips) stands before her loved ones and explains how planning her own funeral turned into something unexpected. “It was turning out to be such a brilliant show,” she says with characteristic warmth, “that I realized I wanted to be alive to see it.” This simple yet profound statement captures the essence of why living memorials are becoming increasingly meaningful celebrations of life.

@funeralchoice Would you want to attend your own funeral? ​ On Netflix's Love at First Sight, Oliver's mother has a "living memorial", often known as a living funeral. The scene shows several Shakespeare readings, alongside some songs and interpretive dances from people in the family's life.​ Have you watched Love at First Sight? What did you think?​ ▶️ Find out more about living funerals on our website.​ #FuneralChoice #Funeral #LivingFuneral #FuneralTok #LivingMemorial #Memorial #Wake #LoveAtFirstSight ♬ original sound – Funeral Choice

For many, the thought of planning their own farewell might seem unusual or even unsettling, but what Tessa’s story beautifully demonstrates is how these celebrations can become powerful expressions of love, gratitude, and connection. Rather than a somber gathering marked by grief, a living memorial offers the precious gift of shared joy and the opportunity to say everything that needs to be said while creating cherished final memories together. In many ways, it’s the ultimate act of love – both for oneself and for those left behind.

A short Synopsis of Love at First Sight

Love at First Sight (2023), directed by Vanessa Caswill and based on Jennifer E. Smith’s novel The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight, is a heartfelt romantic drama starring Haley Lu Richardson as Hadley Sullivan and Ben Hardy as Oliver Jones. The story begins when Hadley and Oliver meet by chance at an airport and bond during a flight from New York to London.

Their chemistry is undeniable, but after landing, the two are separated by the chaos of Heathrow Airport and life’s obligations. Hadley is en route to her father’s second wedding, while Oliver is heading to his mother’s Shakepearean-themed Living Funeral. Despite the seeming improbability of meeting again, fate continues to play a role in their story.

The film explores themes of chance, love, and human connection, showcasing how life’s unexpected moments can change everything.

A Shakespeare-Themed Farewell

For Tessa and her husband Val, who met and fell in love during a Shakespeare class at university, their shared passion for the Bard’s works became the perfect theme for her living memorial. Hosted in London’s iconic Battersea Arts Centre, with its stunning Octagonal Hall and lovingly restored Victorian Theatre, the celebration transformed into a theatrical masterpiece where love, laughter, and literature intertwined.

The space itself became a character in their story, with theater-style seating facing a stage adorned with elegant floral arrangements, while comfortable sofas and chairs created intimate spaces for quiet conversations behind the main seating area. Guests arrived dressed as Shakespearean characters, adding an extra layer of joy and creativity to the celebration.

Why Consider a Living Memorial?

As Hadley, another character in the film, thoughtfully observes, “What’s the point of having all these people say nice things about you if you’re not around to hear it?” Living memorials offer a unique opportunity to:

• Share in the celebration of your life with loved ones
• Hear the impact you’ve had on others’ lives
• Create lasting memories together
• Say goodbye in your own way
• Help loved ones process grief together

Related: How to Plan your own Living Memorial

Details We Love: Creating Your Own Living Memorial

The Perfect Venue

Choose a space that reflects your personality and can accommodate both formal ceremony and informal gathering. Tessa’s choice of the Battersea Arts Centre perfectly embodied her theatrical spirit while providing various spaces for different aspects of the celebration.

Ceremony Structure

As film narrator Jameela Jamil shares: Tessa’s living memorial lasted one hour and 32 minutes, featuring an impressive 26 eulogies that included:

• Nine monologues
• Five poems
• Eight songs
• Three dances
• One freestyle rap
• A surprising DJ set

This variety allowed everyone to express their love and appreciation in their own unique way, from Luther’s unexpected EDM electronic dance music eulogy to more traditional Shakespeare-inspired performances.

Personal Touches

Consider incorporating elements that reflect your life’s passions:

• Themed costumes or dress code
• Interactive elements
• Photo displays
• Memory sharing opportunities
• Meaningful music selections (Tessa and Val’s dance to Bear’s Den’s “Above the Clouds of Pompeii”)

To bring flowers or not to bring flowers… that is the question

One touching moment in the film addresses the question of traditional memorial customs when Hadley arrives with flowers, unsure if it’s appropriate. Tessa’s graceful response as she accepts the posy of memorial flowers, “I think that it’s less weird now,” reminds us that living memorials can embrace both traditional and contemporary expressions of love and respect.

The Art of Ceremony: The Celebrant’s Touch

Throughout Tessa’s living memorial, the natural flow between heartfelt Shakespeare monologues, surprising EDM tributes, and tender moments of connection didn’t happen by chance. Like a skilled conductor leading an orchestra, a celebrant or master of ceremonies brings harmony to these deeply emotional gatherings. They understand when to encourage laughter, when to hold space for tears, and how to create gentle transitions between the different expressions of love and remembrance.

Think of them as your ceremony’s guiding light – the person who ensures Uncle Jim’s elaborate sonnet flows seamlessly into your best friend’s interpretive dance tribute, all while making sure your shy cousin feels just as supported in sharing her quiet words of love. They’re there to read the room, sense when emotions need space to breathe, and know exactly when to lift the energy with a more lighthearted moment.

Crafting Comfort in Every Detail

The success of Tessa’s celebration wasn’t just in its grand theatrical moments, but in the thoughtful attention to practical comfort that allowed those moments to shine. In the film, they took advantage of the sheer size of the space, sectioning an area for the stage and theater seating, and bringing in cozy conversation areas with comfy chairs and sofas.

It’s important to recognise that different guests need different things throughout such an emotional event. Some might need to sit quietly and process, while others find comfort in sharing stories with small groups.

Just as Tessa’s celebration lasted one hour and 32 minutes – not too long to drain energy, not too short to feel rushed – timing becomes a dance of its own. Consider how to keep everyone comfortable and engaged, perhaps with gentle breaks for refreshments that allow guests to catch their breath between emotional moments.

And while you’re present in the celebration, having someone capture these precious interactions – the spontaneous hugs, the tearful smiles, the burst of laughter – creates a lasting testament to the love shared in the room. These recordings become treasured keepsakes for those who’ll want to revisit the warmth and connection of the day.

Creating Your Own Meaningful Goodbye

Every person’s story is unique, and their living memorial should reflect that individuality. Whether it’s a Shakespeare-themed theatrical production like Tessa’s or something completely different, the key is creating a celebration that authentically represents your life and relationships.

Find Your Perfect Celebrant

A skilled celebrant can help you design and facilitate a living memorial that honors your story and brings your vision to life. They can:

• Help you structure the ceremony
• Guide you through planning decisions
• Ensure everyone feels included
• Create a safe space for emotion and celebration
• Handle practical coordination on the day

Ready to explore the possibility of creating your own living memorial? The Celebrant Directory features experienced celebrants who can help you craft a ceremony that’s as unique as your life story.

Find Your Perfect Celebrant Now

Your life story deserves to be celebrated in your own way, surrounded by those you love.